Online across California · In person in North Lake TahoeCouples therapy for ADHD and neurodivergent partners
When at least one of you is wired differently, the same fights keep looping. We slow things down, help you understand how the other person actually works, and take on the problem together.
Nurture your nature ·
Nurture your nature ·
Who it's forCouples where ADHD, high sensitivity, or OCD shapes the dynamic. One or both of you. I also provide premarital counseling.
What it isInsight driven, nervous-system-aware couples therapy that works with how each of you is actually wired.
WhereOnline across California, in person in North Lake Tahoe.
How to startA free 15-minute consultation.
The fight you keep having
Relationships change over time and yet we can find ourselves stuck in the same cycle. Throw in the responsibility of raising a family, building a career, or caring for aging parents can, and these patterns can become entrenched, slowly wearing down the connection you started with. Blending families, navigating in-laws, parenthood, career changes can bring up things neither of you feels fully equipped to handle alone. Couples therapy can help support the team so that you can traverse this changing landscape together.
Other times it isn't change at all — it's just difference. Different interests, different backgrounds, different ways of loving. It's easy to read that as one person not being invested or interested, when really it's two people who came from different places, learning how to build a shared language.
You're stuck in the same pursue-distance dance — one of you reaching, the other pulling back, over and over.
There's a difference in terms of social, financial, or intimacy needs between partners.
Conflict resolution: you just see the same situation differently, and can't move on.
You're growing in different directions.
Couples therapy helps to manage and celebrate these differences. I also provide premarital counseling which looks at clear communication, value alignment and expectations before marriage.
How we work together
We identify the pattern, slow it down, and get curious.
We look at how each of you is actually wired — ADHD, sensitivity, anxiety and all — and build something that fits you both.
We slow the cycle down.
Most fights are two nervous systems escalating faster than words can keep up. We work in the moment so that you can feel the spiral start and step out of it before it runs the show.
We translate.
A lot of the work is figuring out what's actually being said underneath the words, glances, or body language— and helping you say it to each other directly, instead of through tone or old assumptions.
I work from an insight driven, nervous system based approach — drawing on Hakomi, emotionally focused therapy, and elements of the Gottman Method — rather than a scripted program. The throughline is helping you each feel truly heard, slow down the reactive cycle, and attune to yourself and the other.. As a couple, you already have what it takes to change this — the work is building the tools and skills that get you there, so you can communicate openly, appreciate each other, and reconnect with the person you love. You can read more about how I work on my about page.
Who this is for
This work fits couples where at least one partner lives with ADHD, high sensitivity, or OCD. I also see neurotypical couples. You don't both need a diagnosis, and you don't need to have it figured out before you come in. If individual work turns out to be the better starting point, we can talk about individual therapy too.
I work full fee and out of network, and provide superbills you can submit to your insurance for possible reimbursement. A sliding scale is available based on need. Sessions are online across California, or in person in North Lake Tahoe.
One honest note: if there's abuse or your safety is at risk, couples work isn't the right starting point, and I can help you find support that is.
Work with AustinHi, I'm Austin.
I'm a licensed therapist for adults with ADHD, OCD, and high sensitivity, especially where they overlap. I use EMDR, somatic therapy, and ecotherapy for the moments when understanding a pattern isn't enough to change it. I believe healing happens in connection: with yourself, with others, and with the land.
Austin Sherman, LMFT · CA license #146132 · MA, California Institute of Integral Studies · Bilingual in English and Spanish
Questions about couples therapy
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No. This work fits when one or both of you live with ADHD, high sensitivity, or OCD — you don't both need a diagnosis, and you don't need to have it figured out before you come in.
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I use a psychodynamic/insight driven and somatically-aware approach that draws on Hakomi, EFT-informed work, and some Gottman Method — focused on slowing the cycle down and helping you each actually feel heard, rather than a fixed script.
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I'm an out-of-network provider and full fee. I provide superbills you can submit to your insurance for possible reimbursement, and I offer a sliding scale based on need.
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No. If the patterns above sound familiar, that's enough to start — we can sort out the rest together.
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Yes. Most couples meet online across California. In-person sessions are available in North Lake Tahoe.
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We'll name it directly. I can also refer you out if couples work with me isn't the right fit.
Don't fight your wiring. Work with it.
If you're tired of feeling disconnected, stuck, or in conflict please reach out. You just have to be willing to look at it together.
NewsletterKeep in touch
A few times a year I send a short email about new workshops, groups, and seasonal retreats, with the occasional note on slowing down and living with a mind that runs fast and feels everything.